Sunday, March 20, 2011

I have live twice...

'yes,mom. i drive slowly. For sure. Tell dad not to worry so much. Okey,i love u mom.'
I hang up my cellphone and continued drive toward home.

Its already 7past 10. the road a bit wet due to rain. That why mom ask me to drive slowly.
The road are clear,no other vehicles been around. maybe it still weekday. but yea i have to go home because next 2 days will be my parent anniversary. Don't wan to miss the event.

about half an hour passing,still no car were seen,just a few big lorries were passing by.

like always,i don't like drive at night and then a lorry passing by,because their headlight were to bright,it hurt my eyes...

then came a lorry,with it's headlight were so bright . I reduce speed. just like being blind for a moment.
the lorry have passed,then i continued my journey.....

then i reach my house....home sweet home....

i park outside because there is a canopy at the parking space...

wow!! this gonna be a huge event...
then entering the house yard, i calling my mom and dad,but no one answering...

i called again...still the same....

with the door unlocked,all the light are turn on...

i wondering where they could be.....

i search every room in the house...no one seem to be there.....

weird.... their son is gettin home and this is how they welcome him... how cruel.....

"the number u been dialed is not in service" now it really weird,both mom and dad can't be contact....where could they been...

but anyway i miss my fiance..since mom and dad not home yet,better i take this time to make a surprise to my love..

i told my parent not to tell her that im coming home..so she will be surprised when she sees me...

then i go to his house....

i called her but same happen here,the number not in service...

ehm..maybe network problem....

arrived at the gate of my fiancée house,also there is no one here...

oh my God... where could they all been...

i wait for her i my car...

past midnight.....

then suddenly it morning....

i must have been sleeping... tired...

then my fiancée appear,look pale and sad...

i try to called her but she quickly enter her's car and drive away....

what have happen to her...

why she didn't noticed i was there....

i followed her.... i wan to know the truth....

Dont let anything bad happen to my relationship....i pray....

then she drive to the hospital.....

why would she drive to hospital in such early morning....

so i park my car and continued to follow her...
i called her's name but she doen't respond to my call...

there is no way i mistake her for another person..
i have know her for 8 year...since my Diploma's....

following her make me wondering so many consequences.....

then she continued to walk to the male ward...
not just any male ward but ER male ward...

im so curiously wondering again,who might she seeing here.....

she entering a ward....
Dad? Mom? i can see them from the outside...
so here they have been... being at hospital..
but why...

Mom looked so sad and dad try to calm her..

what going on? why can't i get it straight....

My fiancee cry and mom hugging her to calm her .....

why??

my mind keep asking why such in sad mood....

As i walked into the room....
now all my question were answered....

Me?
It was me who on the hospital bed...

me? OH MY GOD!!!

what have happen....

im looking at my self lied down at the bed....

something must be wrng...
i try to communicate with them but they seem not be able to hear me...
i try to touch them but it just like grabbing thin air...
meaningless..............

an old man ,about my dad ages, telling that he are the lorry driver that had a crash with me..

he have send me to hospital and went to police station to make a report then just came to hospital after all the matters been handled....

He mention that he already give a high bean light to warn me.. but its too late... my car have been taking his path....

He just able to turn a bit to minimize the effect....

Accident?

OH GOD!!! Help me!!
what i have done....

then remembered that before the bright light came,i a little bit sleepy.....

I think that i fall asleep....

Oh God!! what must i do....

i see..
mom crying...
dad really sad....
my love holding my hand with tears at her eyes....

then.... they seem to cry loud for doctor...

the medical team came rushing through me..

i see they try to revive me..

am i dying...

is this the end....

Oh God..take me if it's time for me to go.....

Goodbye mom......
Goodbye dad.....
Goodbye love....
.........................................................................................................................................................................

I close my eyes and reach for the light....

BUB!!

BUB!!

BUB!!
i fell like 3 big punches been give to my chest...

then the first voice i hear......

'He'alive'

then i realized that i have lied down at the bed with a doctor and nurse surround me...

my mom rushed to me and cry.... dad look relief and try to sweep away his tear...

Love?? she hug me and say i love u to me...

Oh GOD,not my time yet?

thank you GOD for giving me 2nd chance with my family and love one...

U give me my life back.......

with only one leg?

still i thank you GOD.....

Now im have gettin old.... with my grandson to play with....

it such a happy life....

Now please take me to her....
she must be worrying about me...

Now GOD..
You have give me 2 life and now is the second time u take it away..

Im ready.....


P/S:This story were based on true story(maybe)

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Dah KU cuba Tapi akhirnya......

3.00 CGPA......
ianya x mustahil utk dikecapi.....
bg orang yang dah dlm kategori tu,tahniah...

bg yang belum berjaya sampai ke tahap tu, teruskan perjuangan anda.....

tp bukan beerti yg belum mengecapi tahap tu x belajar....

bukan main2 belajar tp x dpt juga...
orang len pun x ckp tidur belajar,mereka pun lebih kurang sama....

cuma nasib xder....

terasa?? sy minta maaf disini kerana sy skrg pun dlm kategori yang ke dua...

bukan x belajar,tapi....
ehm x tau lah....

nak cakap x jawab time final,satu soalan pun x miss......

saya x tau sama ada saya layak utk meneruskan lagi pengajian saya di peringkat ijazah kalau keadaan mcm ni msh berlaku.....

kalau kemarau berpanjangan,jawab nya kontang air empangan...

terfikir hendak tarik diri dari perperangan.... tapi perjalan balik pasti menyedihkan.....

orang selalu ckp"usaha tangga kejayaan"

macam mana perasaan korang kalau dah berusaha x juga berjaya....
ada lagi x pepatah mcm tu dlm hidup?

usaha,tekad,niat.....

semua dah...
xtau lah mana silap nyer.....

benda mcm ni mcm nak "dimuntah mati mak,Ditelan mati bapa"

Xder lagi win2 situation...

orang yang dah berusaha sehabis baik tetapi masih dlm kelompok yang x berapa sgt mcm saya ni semesti nya faham apa perasaan jika berada dlm situasi begini....

yelah, pokok ditebang sagu nya tiada,bagaimana hndak dipelihara kehidupan sekeluarga....
sudah berusaha sehabis nyawa,tapi kempunan jua akhir nya....




Friday, February 25, 2011

Bila Usia memakan kita.....

Sori guys lama dah x up date blog.....

buat Miss Faraha(http://akusekakipayung.blogspot.com)..

Betul2 sori..
hehhehee...
first month xder internet..
2nd month girlfriend pinjam lappie....

so cukup lah disitu.....

ehm...
nie time sy tggu bas kat seksyen 2 shah alam pada raya cina yg lepas....

start dari pagi sampai nak dekat tghari ah masa tu....
sy terlihat seorang pack cik(or datuk kot) sama menunggu disitu dgn sy....

dia mcm xtau bas mana yang dia nak naik tu.....
ke hulu ke hilir dia berpanas tanya setiap bas n teksi yang lalu.....
setiap kali patah balik,duduk, dia mengeluh....

sy pun tanya lah ke mana dia nak pergi....
dia jawab nak pergi ke seri muda....

seri muda...
mcm pernah dgr lah.....

eh tempat abang aku belajar dulu....
sy pun tanya kan abg teksi kat situ pergi x seri muda....

sorg pun abg teksi ckp x pg...
patut lah pakcik td mengeluh.....

tunggu punya tggu baru bas CITYLINK sampai n then sy tanya abg driver tu mcm mn nak g seri muda,then abg tu jawab kene g klang dulu baru dpt g seri muda....

maka saya panggil pakcik td utk naik bas tu...
sy ingat kan abg td spy bgtau kat pakcik tu mana bas yg dia patut ikut selepas itu...

bas pun berlalu...
.......

eh pakcik td dah naik bas,sy plak tggl sorang2....
sambil mesej2 'BGAL',terlintas di pikiran sy......

pakcik yg sebegitu tua di biarkan berjalan sorg2 kat sini mcm xda anak pula yg jaga....
tp kalau xda anak nak jaga,dah nasib lah.....

tp kalau ada anak pula,kenapa wat ayah mcm tu...
x patut betul lah...
kesian pakcik tu....
dah lah tua......

I don't know what happen to our community....
very simple thing,jaga mak n ayah tme mrka dah tua,tu pun x dpt ker........

bg sesiapa yang berbuat begitu,sila kenang balik apa yg dah ibu bapa kita wat utk kita...

kita wat mrk mcm tu,anak kite nanti mcm mana agak nya terhadap kita......

semua agama mengajar penganut nya berbuat baik and hormat terhadap ibu bapa mereka...

ingat perngorbanan mereka..............

P/S: bagi sesiapa yg terasa dgn coretan ni,sy minta maaf....
cuma nak wat teladan dan sempadan....
THINK......WE GET WHAT WE GAVE............

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Kepadamu Kekasih.......

Lagu ni mengingat kan saya kepada kekasih saya yg jauh di sana.....

KepadaMu Kekasih

Aku berserah
Kerana ku tahu Kau lebih mengerti
Apa yang terlukis di cermin wajahku ini
Apa yang tersirat di hati
Bersama amali

KepadaMu Kekasih
Aku bertanya
Apakah Kau akan menerimaku kembali
Atau harus menghitung lagi
Segala jasa dan bakti
Atau harus mencampakku ke sisi
Tanpa harga diri

Hanya padaMu Kekasih
Aku tinggalkan
Jawapan yang belum ku temukan
Yang bakal aku nantikan
Bila malam menjemputku lena beradu

KepadaMu Kekasih
Aku serahkan
Jiwa dan raga
Jua segalanya
Apakah Kau akan menerima penyerahan ini
Apakah Kau akan menerimaku
Dalam keadaan begini

Kepadamu Kekasih M Nasir


Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Bila Ku keseorangan.........

semester pun dah sampai ke penghujung nya....
kalau paper dah habis,grenti lah semua akan balik...

group pertama yg balik
1.Dibasron
2.Nurhasziana
3.Sherilline

Group kedua.
1.Ben
2.Jafre

saya belum balik g...

still stay kat uitm...

Bila balik?
EHm... Xtau lah.....

Apa yg saya boleh wat sorg2 yer?

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Sedih melihat member balik awal.....

Sedih x kalau kawan2 awak semua baik awal dari awak...
dah lah sorg2... makan nanti pun sorg2....
tido biasa lah sorg2....

xtau kenapa hari ni saya x dpt tdo... guling sana guling sini.....
lompat sana lompat sini....

maybe saya sedih kot...

semua org akan balik x lama lg...
saya balik lambat...
rindu kat datuk ngn nenek.....

nasib saya sejati... kalau AAW..dah lama saya nangis.....

Xtau lah kenapa EMO sgt time menaip post nie.... maybe ada yg dah jumpa family masa nie...
paper final exam pun tggl 1 lagi....

hari selasa ni last....
lepas tu kesepian diri ku ini...
dah lah facebook waktu opis hour x dpt buka....

kenapa saya mebebel nie...

apalah yg saya nak wat nanti tggu 18hb tu.....

kalau lah ada kawan.... grenti saya ajak jalan2... karaoke.... ambik2 gambar....

malam ni pun sunyi mcm tau2 jer saya tgh sedih....

entah bila lah kesedihan ini akan terubat.....

hp mmg selalu ada mesej dari si dia.... tp di hati ada teman..... disisi?

Satu lagi nie... apa yg saya nak bawa pg ke giants utk bersukaria?

Wahai kawan2 ku.. jgn lah menunjuk kan tanda2 yg korang dah packing ke apa kerana sememg nya perbuatan itu meletakkan garam ke luka ku..... HUHUUU!!!!!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Tidur dpt melegakan stress...

xtau lah utk kamu semua tp bg saya,tidur dpt mengurangkan stress...

xtau kenapa..asal saya stress grenti saya akan tdo lama gila...

tp x bermaksud jika saya tdo mlm2 tu maksud nya saya stress..

td saya rasa stress dan trus jer tdo sebaik kembali dari bilik peperiksaan...

ini 1st time saya stress disebabkan paper final....utk sem ni jer kot...

so apa blh wat... kena tukar cara study and mistake is a learning process..